In Limbo

I'm not sure I've really written about something rather siesmic that's going on in our family at the moment. I'm about to become a grandfather. My youngest daughter is very, very pregnant. We're talking days or hours away from "all systems go".

We wondered if we would make it to the end of Friday without a panicked race towards the hospital, or if Saturday or Sunday might look more likely. Given that a certain somebody's body has progressed no further in turning life as she knows it upside down, we're still all still here - counting the hours - not sleeping properly - and wondering when - not if.

As long as we get to through the next few days with everybody safe and well, I really don't mind how we get there, or how long things take.

I had to share our current situation at work this week - given that I might have to vanish at a moment's notice. Some of my co-workers have already started calling me Grandad.

A good friend asked last night what I will be known as - Grandad, Gramps, Grandpa? I really don't mind. Whatever I get called, I have enormous boots to fill. My grandparents still loom large in my core memories. As a child, I never tired of listening to their stories, or helping them with errands, chores, or just tagging along with whatever they were doing.

I remember playing chess on the floor at christmas-time against Grandad Beckett - a tall, quiet yorkshireman. I'll never forget his mantra - "Hear all, see all, do all, and say nowt". He taught me about saving money, and the importance of eating brussel sprouts.

I also remember spending hours in the shed at my other Grandad's - Grandad Hall - making endless swords and battleships out of wooden offcuts, and learning songs from him that I wasn't allowed to sing at home. One of the songs was a variation on "Old King Cole" that ended with him falling into an outside toilet pit.

"The sun shone on the toilet door, the old king had a fit. Old King Cole fell down the hole, and he was covered in... sweet violets". Oh, how we laughed.

So yes - I'm becoming a grandad at some point over the next few days. I'm not quite sure how I feel about that. While washing up earlier, I thought about it - and realised that at least my grandchildren will get to know me. When I see people having children later in life, I wonder if their children miss out by perhaps not knowing their grandparents for as long as they might during their formative years.

I'm pretty sure I'll be the first in my generation in our family to become a grandparent. That feels very odd.